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View Full Version : [REPOST FROM 1C] The most serious issue plaguing the flight sim community to date!



Puppet
Dec-18-2011, 17:50
The following was posted on the 1C forum earlier today. It disappeared within about 10 minutes. I would like to assure everyone that this post in meant to amuse and inform, rather then offend. If however you still feel the need to be offended, by all means let me know. The preferred methods being by "name calling" ,"thread flaming" or some variation thereof.



-Puppet


I know we have all waded through the seemingly endless steaming swamp of threads about the nearly bottomless pit (http://www.fugly.com/media/IMAGES/Random/bottomless_pit.jpg) of bugs (http://icons.iconarchive.com/icons/sykonist/looney-tunes/256/Bugs-Bunny-Carrot-icon.png) (actual and imaginary) within CloD and other flight sims (http://lockon.co.uk/) of the past. These threads are generally filled with people whining about this flight model, or that exploit. Along with the wild dick-waving (http://www.urbandictionary.com/define.php?term=Dick%20Waving%20Contest), these "Luftwhiners" and "Sissyfire jocks" often enjoy spreading misinformation and wild speculation.






http://growabrain.typepad.com/photos/uncategorized/2008/02/06/nazi_bikers.jpg

"Luftwhiners"




http://www.wakemag.org/wp-content/uploads/2008/03/shitqueen-2.jpg

"Sissyfire jocks"






No wonder there isn't a heavy presence from the devs in here. I imagine they have to deal with the same thing in Russian (http://englishrussia.com/images/wedding_village/2.jpg), why go through it in two languages!



Anyway, to get back to my original t̶r̶o̶l̶l̶ point, the grave issue at hand!

For years I have watched as it spread through the flight sim community like glitter (http://cdn.idolator.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/kesha-house-of-blues-show-500x360.jpg) in an elementary school class room, or perhaps herpes (http://cdn.idolator.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/kesha-house-of-blues-show-500x360.jpg) in a university dorm.

This most horrible affliction, that has many a time caused me to awaken late in the night, covered in the cold sweat. It goes seemingly unnoticed by the unwashed masses (http://www.danwitz.com/files/12-big-mosh-pit-2007-copy.jpg).




http://cdn.idolator.com/wp-content/uploads/2011/02/kesha-house-of-blues-show-500x360.jpg

"Glitter and Herpes"

Are they afraid to speak up?

Or are they just so transfixed by the waving dicks of the posts mentioned above as to be oblivious?

I do not know.



But, I have kept my silence for too long!



This needs to end now before more people are hurt.




"Puppet, what is this most terrible plague?!"- You

"What could be so awful, Puppet, that it stirred you to write so much aimless rambling above?!"- Your Mom




Well, Ill just tell you dear.



This most AWFUL





DEPLORABLE





HEINOUS





and GROTESQUE of things!







Is the continuous use of this word by pilots approaching to land....











"FINALS"



Who the @#$% started this? Its nonsense (http://brainsyndicate.files.wordpress.com/2010/09/tom-cruise-scientology.jpg)! Since when is there more than one final leg to a circuit? You are either on final, or you are not on final. STOP SAYING FINALS. THERE IS NO S! You are driving me nuts!



The name of the final stage of the circuit is aptly named "final".


http://www.tc.gc.ca/media/images/ca-publications/circuit-standard-smaller.gif

"The Circuit"

You may be "on final", "turning final", "approaching to join straight in final"

But you are never ever on "finals".

If you have, in the past have found yourself saying something along the lines of,

"RAF/.733T Scallywag on FINALS at Mansgate!"

STOP STOP STOP!

If your find yourself saying it again after reading this informative and enlightening little gem of a post, please, punch yourself in the face.
Not for yourself, but for Puppet, and anyone else like me that has nothing better to do than s̶p̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶o̶f̶f̶ ̶a̶b̶o̶u̶t̶ ̶r̶a̶n̶d̶o̶m̶ ̶n̶o̶n̶i̶s̶s̶u̶e̶s̶ educate the masses about important topics like this.

</Rant>

Thats it.
All I have to say.
Yes you have read all of that just to get here.
The time you spent reading this you will never get back.










Of course, if someone shows me some historical evidence that the use of the term "finals" was used by mainstream aviation at some point in the past, I will gladly retract my statement above.

ATAG_Snapper
Dec-18-2011, 18:11
OK, I would say this is the GOOFIEST post we've had on this forum since I've come here. And we're talkin' over a month!!!!

Don't know where you got a pic of me dear ol' Dad (Sissyfire) and Mum (Herpietta), but I'm deeply offended to see them ridiculed so!!!!:0:

Seriously, you should know better than try to inject humour on that other forum! LOL

And that's my finals word on the topic......

ChiefRedCloud
Dec-20-2011, 11:12
Trying out for the second coming of Monty Python are we M8 ....... very good. :goofy:

Dutch
Dec-20-2011, 11:23
Superbs stuffs mates!

I dids replys at 1c's befores yous weres ignominiouslys removeds, buts Snapper's pincheds mys jokes!

'I shit the Queen' - excellent! :Grin:

ATAG_Snapper
Dec-20-2011, 11:48
I pinched your jokes? Sorry mate, unintentional! I missed the IC debut, so I plead ignorance -- and I've got lots of it! LOL

OTOH, this proves great minds think alike! :laugh1

MajorBorris
Dec-26-2011, 16:21
I hate when I do that, for the record I know what final means too lol

The thing that people say that bugs me the MOST? :noCOMING:no

I will now give a few examples but not all as all of them will drive me to flee in disgust:vomit:


1) "Hes coming on your rear"

2) " Youve got two coming from behind""

3) "Ive got one coming on my six"

4) "Theres another one coming"

5) "Hes coming on the bottom of you"

It goes on and on, nightly.

Calm down Borris...happy thoughts:eek:

Katdog5
Dec-26-2011, 23:59
It's perfectly ordinary banter, Squiffy. Bally Jerry ... pranged his kite right in the how's yer father ... hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper's and caught his can in the Bertie. Um ... sausage squad up the blue end!

ATAG_Bliss
Dec-27-2011, 06:00
Puppet - that was good shit! lol


I hate when I do that, for the record I know what final means too lol

The thing that people say that bugs me the MOST? :noCOMING:no

I will now give a few examples but not all as all of them will drive me to flee in disgust:vomit:


1) "Hes coming on your rear"

2) " Youve got two coming from behind""

3) "Ive got one coming on my six"

4) "Theres another one coming"

5) "Hes coming on the bottom of you"

It goes on and on, nightly.

Calm down Borris...happy thoughts:eek:

Hmm - sounds like a typical night in coms :laugh:

MajorBorris
Dec-27-2011, 16:23
I have never been a real fight pilot in ww2 but I spose didnt say coming all the time for the same reason it make me laugh and maybe used somthing like "closing"

Dutch
Dec-27-2011, 23:55
It's perfectly ordinary banter, Squiffy. Bally Jerry ... pranged his kite right in the how's yer father ... hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper's and caught his can in the Bertie. Um ... sausage squad up the blue end!

I can't really follow that. Ginger. :Grin:

LG1.Farber
Dec-31-2011, 14:30
Good post top marks!

335th_GRAthos
Jan-01-2012, 03:58
It's perfectly ordinary banter, Squiffy. Bally Jerry ... pranged his kite right in the how's yer father ... hairy blighter, dicky-birdied, feathered back on his Sammy, took a waspy, flipped over on his Betty Harper's and caught his can in the Bertie. Um ... sausage squad up the blue end!

Does anybody know what origin language I have to select in Google Translator in order to get the English translation of ths text? :go:

ROFL